Looking for answers

Sometimes going through a divorce you may look for answers to satisfy yourself or understand logically, you may need to either justify or put the blame why it did not work out only to understand that dwelling on it did not take the pain away.

You may find that thinking about the person may be a love hurt feeling, you know that it is not good for you to think about the person yet you go back and forth reliving moments in the pass and this amplify your pain.

Your divorce is an emotional feeling and logic is not a substitute for how you feel.

Dealing with love

You may always feel love for the child’s parent except the love is not the same as it was before.

You may have come away with new experiences, new growth.

Early days of divorce

You may feel numb and may not trust yourself to do things for fear you are not in your body.

During the early days of your divorce, you may feel as if you are living through a nightmare especially if you had build a long term relationship
and children are involved.

Your emotions go through a series of feelings within an hour, from fear, hurt, emptiness, don’t want to live, emotional pain in your chest, anxiety, sadness, anger and this goes on for weeks and months for many.

Changing focus

When little children are involved it forces you to change the focus from you to them.

You need help from someone that is not involved and will not take sides to help work out visitation for the children other parent.

Getting out of pain

Getting out of pain start with you taking one step at a time, so jumping into another relationship does not help you to heal you it, simply avoids the pain.

Some people get caught up in work so they do not feel and they numb themselves from the pain hoping it will go away.

Get help with family and friends that will support you and gradually start doing things for you such as sport it will help you to work off some pent up energy.

You get over the pain by gradually changing the focus from the other person to you by re-discovering what you like and do not like.

The most difficult part of the process is to put yourself first if you are not accustoming to doing it.

Conclusion: Getting over divorce is no easy task for anyone that has been involve emotionally and with time and counseling you will overcome it.

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